"Parents are not interested in justice; they are interested in quiet" -Bill Cosby
I'm going to tell you a secret. Every year as school winds down and summer amps up, I get a little sick to my stomach. As other Moms proclaim the love of having their little ones close to home all summer, I fight back the waves of nausea caused by the panic I feel for the approaching transition from one routine to another. Don't get me wrong. Of course I love my little darlings, but those little darlings become little devils all too often when adjusting to life together. I've taken some time to try to identify just what it is I dread so much, and it boils down to one simple, but prolific element to our daily lives every year at this time: squabbling.
It's the unending whining about who gets the arm rest in the car or who gets the coveted couch spot for the designated potato hour in front of the TV, etc. After a few days of this, I have had enough. The limits of tolerance I have very often results in saying to my older child, "Just deal with it." Justice is certainly not served, and, I'm sure my oldest will have years of therapy to fund into adulthood.... but what is a mother to do?
Luckily, thanks to a handy-dandy iPhone app, I stumbled upon an article in USA Today discussing sibling rivalry. I read it carefully, hoping that it might provide some insight and concrete ideas in helping me survive the turbulent transition weeks as we settle into summer. The article did not disappoint. In fact, it provided one of the most useful parenting tactics I've come across in a long time: Child of the Day.
Here is the lowdown: each day, one of my two daughters is "child of the day." Because I only have two, this privilege alternates every other day. When it's that child's on day, they are able to have that arm rest, or couch potato perch. If an argument ensues over where we stop for an afternoon snack, the solution is easy- the child of the day gets to choose. It's sheer magic! We have implemented this in my house hold for about three weeks, and the level of acceptance is amazing. We have yet to have anyone contest the benefits of being the child of the day, even if it's an off day for one of them. I can only hope that the acceptance rolls straight through the summer. Truth be told, my hopes are high. Maybe now I'll be able to gush on my face book status how happy I am to have my babies at my side uninterrupted for the next three months.... or not.
Here is a link to the article:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2010-05-04-favorites04_CV_N.htm
brilliant!
ReplyDeleteLizzie